Madonna at a Yankees game in June
The news about her divorce isn’t even a week old and yet there’s already talk that Madonna wants to make babies with New York Yankees star Alex Rodriguez. Since the hopeless romantic in me knows that Madonna would’ve never cheated on her husband, she must have met and fell in love with A-Rod between last Wednesday’s divorce announcement and now. Wow, crazy stuff. I guess you can never tell where your heart will lead you . . . except on Tuesday nights. For some reason, it always leads me to the “massage parlor.” God bless you and your magical hands Wang Lee. The Daily Mail says:
Madonna, 50, is hoping she can have a natural child with Rodriguez, despite her age. The singer is planning her future with the American baseball player, it emerged last night. There is no suggestion that Madonna has to date had a physical relationship with Rodriguez. However, a friend said: “She thinks he’s physically a great specimen. And if she is going to have another child, he would be the ideal man to bring one to her.” (Source)
If A-Rod can bring life that that barren, calcified, demonic wasteland of a womb, then he should be crowned the new “Champion of Men.” That washes away all of the choke jobs he’s done for the Yankees, redeems him for making a fool out of his wife, and I’ll even find forgiveness in my dead heart for the highlights in his hair. Tito Ortiz is the current champion, but all he had to do was impregnate Jenna Jamison — who only has a depleted man-catcher. I think Madge’s wormhole is owned by none other than Beelzebub himself.
Tue, Oct 21, 2008
Celebrities